3 more conversation killers with your kids
Here are three more things to keep in mind when you are talking to your kids.
1. Don’t be in a hurry. It took them some time to get the guts to talk to you about this stuff….don’t rush them! If your kid’s conversation starts to wander (and it probably will), get back on track by asking, “what happened next”. Avoid saying, “Hurry up” or “Get to the point”.
They crave your time and energy!!! Give it to them. Think of it as a flower opening in the sun…this is NOT time lapse photography!!!
2. Don’t placate them with meaningless reassurances. “Don’t worry, everything will be fine”, “Things happen for a reason”, “This will work itself out”, etc. It’s 1,000 times better to say nothing than to bush this important stuff off under the rug.
Think back when you were a kid and to a time when you had the same thing happen to you. Tell them about it. Be candid. Talk about your feelings! Kids love to know they are not alone. When you do this, you identify with them! They will know you understand and they will trust you more.
3. Under no circumstances should you interrupt. When your kid talks, just listen. Do NOT jump in with corrections or contradictions. Do not finish their sentences for them. Do not talk over them. Just Listen to Learn!
God gave you two eye and two ears and only one mouth for a reason. Listen twice as much as you talk and observe them!
Be thoughtful. Listen to them. Repeat what they said back to you to make sure you have it correctly. Sometimes they will talk about one thing, but it is really another they are concerned about. Take the time to make sure you know what the issues is and listen, listen, listen!